Shinseiki Kidou Senshi Gundam SeeD: War for Sol
by Zer0 Kataru
Summary: Chp.2 UP! The Gundam Pilots are trying to get used to a civilian life with Nittle Grasper when a third war breaks out, all the way from DISNEYLAND! Yaoi Warning. You can join the story too-See inside for details.
1. Quatre x Ryuichi!

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Skies of Shinseiki Kidousenshi Gundam SeeD: War for Sol   
  
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NOTES: You, too, can be in this fic! However, this is different from OC fics. Interested? Check the bottom of this chapter, AFTER the "To Be Continued" bit.   
  
DISCLAIMER: I doth noteth owneth Gundam Wing, Gundam SEED, Final Fantasy VIII, Final Fantasy VII, Gravitation, Zoids, Kingdom Hearts, Skies of Arcadia, Pokemon, Digimon or Disney. Eth.   
  
~*~   
  
A black screen.   
  
It flickers.   
  
Then it turns blue.   
  
White text appears on it.   
  
"Program Zer0KataruFanfics.exe has caused an internal error at point 109475e43214x325174681450. Please shut down Windows now." A fist hits the screen, and it turns black again.   
  
~*~   
  
White text with gold, firey outlines appears.   
  
I'll be here.   
  
We see Heero. He looks disturbed. The camera pans to the front door, and Relena appears.   
  
I'll be waiting for you,   
  
Heero's mind wanders to Treize's death, then he snaps back to reality, screams like a little girl, and runs out the back door.   
  
so if you come here,   
  
Heero hides in the nearby bushes, pulls a sniper rifle, and looks for Relena through the window.   
  
you'll find me...   
  
Heero sees Relena in the window, and takes aim at her head...   
  
I promise.   
  
Heero pulls the trigger. Relena flies backwards, blood pouring out of her new bullet wound. ^_^   
  
~*~(cut to A Random Lag Range Colony) (A/N: And yes, I know it's spelt La Grange. But Lag Range sounds better.)   
  
The Gundam Pilots (including the musicians and miscellaneous characters of Gravitation) lie on a grass field, watching the clouds. Ever since the battle of Mariemaia, they have had no success in having a life, so they just mooched off Quatre and started the stupidest idea in a world of pacifists: a mercenary company. Despite not having a snowball's chance in hell of having any kind of customers, they are determined to continue with the project, and are currently faced with the dilemma of naming their company. We'll leave them to their devices since they're not needed to tell this first part of the story.   
  
~*~(cut to End of the World, during the ending sequence)   
  
Ansem: Fill me, Kingdom Hearts, with eternal darkness!   
  
Donald: o_O You n00b, you don't randomly ask things to fill you with eternal darkness.   
  
Sora: ...I understand now. Kingdom Hearts is... Light!   
  
Kingdom Hearts: *light flies out and kills Ansem*   
  
Sora: *seals KH Door & loses Kairi, etc, etc, etc*   
  
~*~(cut to just after the ending sequence after the credits)   
  
Sora, Donald & Goofy: *about to board Excalibur*   
  
Sora: *jumps in*   
  
Donald: Hey! I wanna drive, you hobba! *jump-attacks Sora with his rod*   
  
Sora: *falls over* My turn! *jumps back up and kicks Donald out of the cockpit*   
  
Riku: You bastard! That's my move!   
  
Sora: Get the fuck in! We're ditching these Disney bastards!   
  
Riku: *salutes* *jumps in*   
  
Sora: *flies away to Olympus Coliseum*   
  
Donald: HOBBA YOU YOU HOBBA HOBBA! GIVE BACK OUR HOBBA'ING *key item* ~Complete Gummi Collection~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111one *shakes fist*   
  
~*~(Cut to later, in Traverse Town - Gepetto's House)   
  
Gepetto: What the hobba?! You can't hobba'ing kick me out! Where the hobba will Pinocchio and I live?!   
  
Squall: ...Elsewhere.   
  
Selphie: RAPTURE! *wings steal Gepetto and Pinocchio and send them away*   
  
Sora: ^_^ WHEE! Guess what?!   
  
Squall: ...Disney World declared war on us?   
  
Sora: ^_^ YUP!   
  
Aerith: ^_^ Do a little dance!   
  
Cloud: ^_^ Make a little love!   
  
All Square Characters In KH Including Sora, Riku and Kairi: AND GET DOWN TONIGHT!   
  
~*~(Cut to outside Traverse Town)   
  
Millions of "Kingdom" model Gummi Ships: *amass outside Traverse Town, ready to blow it to pieces*   
  
Excalibur (Leviathan Model), 2 more Leviathans and 3 Diablos Gummi Ships: O_O STATUTORY FUCKING RAAAAAAAAAAPE! *flee to Mars Terraformation Project: "Gaia"*   
  
~*~(Cut to Sanq)   
  
Figures clad in royal coat-like-thingys-that-Relena-and-Noin-wear-in-the-Sanq-Kingdom-bit sit in a dim room, around a glowing table, discussing high-and-important matters. Two, one in black, one in white, stand. The one in black mutters about being inactive, and the two excuse themselves. The remaining people discuss the recent influx in Gaia's population and the cause behind it.   
  
~*~(Cut to a black, dim room)   
  
The two military people that left the conference stand on metal platforms, intently watching a black screen. The words "1st Stage" appear, the song "Can't Stop Fallin' In Love (Speed Mix)" starts up, and the people go at it. Blackie starts mashing the platform with barrages of flat-foot stomps, (haha yeah right, it's hard to play CSFIL:SM-Heavy without bar-raping, let alone flat-footing it AND stomping) missing steps every so often, and Whitie immediately bar-rapes and makes slow, calcuated steps. Let's leave them to their business, and return to...   
  
~*~(Cut to Random Lag Rage Colony, in a bedroom)   
  
Quatre, covered in nothing but sweat, lies next to Ryuichi, clad in the same outfit, and taps on his bandmate's chest. Ryuichi takes it as another invitation, and attempts to straddle Quatre. Said blonde, though, pushes Ryuichi off and stands, going to his beloved Keyboardmania machine. Ryuichi sighs, and follows suit, turning on their PS2 and starting up Karaoke Revolution. They make wonderful music together, especially with Noriko and Trowa playing Keyboardmania and Guitar Freaks, respectively, in the next room. Since we know our beloved musicians/gundam pilots/extras are all happy, let's take a look at...   
  
~*~(Cut to MO-2 - Military Offensive Spaceport)   
  
We see multiple shuttles and battleships enter the Spaceport from Earth, and the camera flies into the hangar. Many battleships are docked, and three battleships launch slowly, the above shuttles conveniently replace them and land, personnel filing out. A few scout ships are launched from the scramble bays, and the camera flies into a command tower, where the aforementioned personnel soon enter. They are a small selection of the Sanq Royal dudes along with some more Generals and World Leaders. They seat themselves into lounges and kit up with coffee and the like. Whitie and Blackie, breathing and sweating heavily, slowly drag themselves in, are debriefed, and then walk out the way they came, presumably to find either a freezer or another stepping contraption thingy. Or to do something evil. Or dirty. We don't know what their allegiance is now, do we? Two seconds later, we hear, extremely loudly, might I add,   
  
"Kaitentou kara nai gengo haitenshon to katai tenpo   
  
I sendou suru jaiken go kara daikenkai senhou!   
  
san doori kara yon doori! hon douri yori honnou ni   
  
makaseta giri wo konpoushi gattsuri onkou ni   
  
hontou ni kono donkou ni mata gatteireba don't worry   
  
donpachi donpachi don kyou de doko don koubi suru nihon tou ni   
  
san doori kara yon doori! hon douri yori honnou ni   
  
makaseta giri wo konpoushi gattsuri onkou ni   
  
hontou ni kono donkou ni mata gatteireba don't worry   
  
donpachi donpachi don kyou de doko don koubi suru nihon tou ni   
  
donpachi donpachi don kyou de doko don koubi suru nihon tou ni   
  
donpachi donpachi don kyou de doko don koubi suru nihon tou ni   
  
son toki son toki son choushi buchi kowashiteiku mihon douri da BAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111one""   
  
and the camera, being run by an American and all, screams and crashes into a wall.   
  
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TO BE CONTINUED   
  
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SPECIAL! Joining the fic!   
  
I can already ph33l the flames coming from Sailor Kirby and Co.'s direction, but you still can't hit me for using "OCs" cuz I'm NOT!   
  
It works like this: OCs are made-up people. Self-Insertion is simply the insertion of a non-existant entity. So technically, putting a closet that you own is considered Self-Insertion Therefore, it is very well possible to have OCs without SI (such as what Sailor Kirby did; putting her friend in her fic, which made it suck), and SI without OCs (anytime an author has a converstion with the characters; Death's Little Sidekick does it before her fics, and Tori does it during her RNDM journals (I won't call them fics cuz THEY'RE NOT FICTION).   
  
And I'm doing the SI-without-OC thing.   
  
How?   
  
Easy. Putting REAL people in the fics without any severe exaggeration (All I did to myself was boost my foot-rating by 2, give myself a weak Gundam (to keep up with the real charas) and make my hair 4cm longer than it really is).   
  
So, to put yourself in the fic, simply write a description of YOURSELF with YOUR REAL NAME. Include the characters (if any) you want to be paired with (if it's a total bishou like a G-Boy it has a small chance of happening, but you'll probably end up as a 1-night stand or whatever), any additional exaggerations you want to make to yourself, what faction you want to be part of, and what your personality is like. Obviously, I can't tell if you're telling the truth, although a few things will help:   
  
1. POSTING WHILE LOGGED IN. I'm not likely to include people that post anonymously (unless they're submitting Random OZzies and the like), plus I'll let you exaggerate yourself a little more if you write well.   
  
2. NOT EXAGGERATING SEVERELY. Obviously submitting yourself as a super-babe named Stephanie will not get you in the fic (though your chances are significantly higher if you want to be paired with me :/). If you want to be better at something, sacrifice something else. For example, if you want to be relatively pretty, have a mediocre name. I don't want to offend anyone, but, seriously, hot chicks have things better to do than fanfiction, (attractive guys, on the other hand, like technology a LOT, so I'll assume there are quite a few males who really are what they claim to be) so trying to be ultra-gorgeous, no matter how disgusting you make your name, will NOT get you in. As a side note, anybody claiming to be a 10-footer (even if you're like a 14-fotoer) had better have REALLY low stats in everything else or I'll scale them down.   
  
3. BEING VERY DETAILED. I'm not asking for eyelash length or whatever, but seriously, I'll totally scale down (or outright reject) people applying as "5'8, really pretty, 100lb, blue eyes, blonde hair, very smart, wears white top and jeans *presses submit button*" Especially the "smart" bit.   
  
So, just remember, if you're like an uber-ugly-fat chick with a name like "Butch", you don't have to submit yourself as that, you can exaggerate until you're just an average person, but if you're a supermodel you'll have to scale down to just above average or pair with an author.   
  
If you're still interested, get submitting! 


	2. D isney Day

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Skies of Shinseiki Kidousenshi Gundam SeeD: War for Sol   
  
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CHAPTER 02: D(isney)-Day  
  
~*~(cut to Luna)  
  
Three battleships, two Archangel-class, the other an Eternal-class, head towards Mars.  
  
~*~(cut to MO-2)  
  
Another battleship, this time a Magellan, leaves the port, heading towards Lag Range Point 1. The camera heads into a conference room, this time quite bright. A map of the Sol System is shown on a display, blue rings appearing just outside of each ESUN-controlled planet's orbit. A quick briefing about exchanging defense shifts is given, and important-looking military men file out of the room after recieving documents. Eventually we're left with the general dude, and two military people, the one in white-and-therefore-more-important-looking asleep in the other guy-who's-dressed-in-black-and-therefore-looks-more-like-a-soldier-so-what-the-fuck-is-he-doing-in-an-important-military-conference's lap, and, of course, the camera. The GWDIBATLMLASSWTFIHDIAIMC pokes TOIWATMIL a couple of times, and the general clears his throat. TOIWATMIL doesn't budge. GWDIBATLMLASSWTFIHDIAIMC delivers a quick smack to TOIWATMIL's ass, and she jolts awake, slapping GWDIBATLMLASSWTFIHDIAIMC in the face. TOIWATMIL quickly apologizes, recieves her files from the general, and quietly leaves the room with GWDIBATLMLASSWTFIHDIAIMC.  
  
~*~(cut back to the spaceport bit)  
  
Many battleships leave the port, all heading in different directions. The camera focuses on one modified black Delphinus-class ship, heading towards Luna. The Magellan from before, with Peacemillion III (It's just a Peacemillion; remember that Peacemillion II is a minivan.) following behind, enters a loose formation with the black modded Delphinus.  
  
~*~(cut to Peacemillion III, RAVE room)  
  
The G-boyz (minus Touma) stand on DDR machines, although the bars are poles.  
  
Quatre, Ryuichi and Noriko stand behind them, and start playing "their" new song, Burning the Floor (Blue Fire Mix). And the G-boyz, sans Touma, start pole-dancing! Wonderful imagery, ne? So, let's leave them alone and go to...  
  
~*~(cut to Gaia, Balamb)  
  
The Eternal and two Archangels from before land around Balamb Garden, and Kira and Friends leave their ships, forcing their way through the guards with the help of Strike and Friends. Kira runs around, pressing "X" at every person in Garden, eventually noticing that none of them realize Strike and Friends just massacred their security. Kira sweatdrops, and Mairyuu and Friends head up to initate even more political debates with Squall. FUN! ^_^  
  
~*~(cut to Earth, in a random tap-dancing class)  
  
A bunch of people do beginning tap-dancing moves to that Swan Lake-Sound of Music-fairy-music that Bishi likes... then it turns to static. All of a sudden, B4U (B4 Za Beat Mix) starts blasting, and the only guy there dressed decently, Janus5000, starts DDR'ing to it, putting Bishi and all his clones to shame. EVEN MORE FUN! ^_^  
  
~*~(cut to teh modded Delphinus, "Delphoenix", in teh lounge-place-yueah!)  
  
TOIWATMIL stands on the DDR stage, although she's in leopard print instead of white. o_O GWDIBATLMLASSWTFIHDIAIMC falls off the other side of the stage and faceplants the next dude's ankle. What happens next is what we like to call the "Domino Effect". TOIWATMIL clears her throat, and chooses the song "Higher". TEH FREESTYLIN TOURNAMENT IS AWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111one  
  
(A/N: And this is more like a DDR fic than a war fic ^_^)  
  
~*~(cut to Hollow Bastion)  
  
Mickey: ...Riiiiiight, so, we're terribly outgunned and outnumbered, but we're going to attempt to hobba them?  
  
Donald: That's the gist of it ^_^  
  
Mickey: ...  
  
Goofy: But, we have allies! ^_^ From Bishi's favourite shows... POKEMON AND DIGIMON!!!!11111one ^_^  
  
Donald: Think about it! We can use Digimon's terrible voice acting to annoy the hobba out of them, while the infinitely spawning Pikachus wear their numbers down, then we attack with our insignificant gummi ships and whatnot ^_^  
  
Mickey: ...Sure ^_^  
  
Donald: So war is declared?  
  
Mickey: OF COURSE ^_^  
  
...And so random Gummi ships and whatnot are deployed from all manner of Disney Worlds. Ahem.  
  
~*~(cut to Mars Defensive Ring)  
  
Archangel and Friends and Balamb Garden and Friends (That is, Ragnarok), as well as an assortment of miscellaneous Nazca/Laurasia ships, fly towards an array of battleships. And then...  
  
"THE GERMANS ARE COMING!"  
  
"..."  
  
"YES! THE GERMANS ARE COMING! THEIR U-BOAT FLEETS STRETCH FOR MILES!"  
  
"...whatever."  
  
"HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE ALL THEIR MIGHTY KAR 98Ks AND MP40s AND StG44s AND PANZERSCHRECKS ALL SHOOTING AT US!? AAH! A PANZERSCHRECK ROCKET...ammo...panzer..thingy...you know what they are! DUCK AND COVER!"  
  
*THUMP*  
  
Screams. And lots of them. And crashes. And slops. How about we get a visual on that...?  
  
The camera flies into Garden, and we see the cause of the chaos.  
  
Laguna Loire, in a British WWII uniform, war helmet-thingy and all, has attempted to dive under a table to dodge a "panzerschreck-rocket-ammo-panzer-thingy" but failed miserably and landed on top of the table, making a mess out of everybody's food, and a food fight erupts. Which doesn't help poor little Squally's situation at all.  
  
"AAH! BULLETS!" Laguna screams, running towards and diving behind Squall, who promptly gets hit in the face with some potato salad. "COME ON SON! DO SOMETHING! KILL THOSE NAZIS! YOU HAVE A GUN...blade... BUT ITS STILL A GUN! FIREEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111one" Squall stares down at Laguna as if he was insane... which he was. "...Hello."   
  
"COME ON SON! FIRE! AAH! A HALFTRACK! USE YOUR SUPER-DUPER-ARMOR-PIERCING-LIONHEART-THINGY!"   
  
"...How are you?" Some new ketchup hits Squall and drips onto Laguna...  
  
"AAH! I'VE BEEN HIT! MEDIC! AAAH! I'M BLEEDING! AAH! CCCH! THIS IS CORPORAL LAGUNA! WE'RE UNDER HEAVY FIRE AT SHORE BREACH AND NEED ADDITIONAL ASSISTANCE! AAH!!!!!11one CHH!" And with that, "Cpl."Laguna drags Squall down and does that commando-crawling thingy to try and get to the lift so Squall can get a "sniper's view of the Nazis". Meanwhile, the food fight spills out into the hallways, classrooms, and library.   
  
~*~(Let's take a quick look in the Training Center.)  
  
A cadet runs into the Training Center with tons of food in his arms, while a huge group of SeeDs and cadets take on a team of T-Rexaurs. The food-cadet runs towards the fight and screams "FOOD FIGHT!". All the humans rush to the food and start pelting each other. The T-Rexaurs exchange looks, and roar, then eat all the SeeDs & cadets. Then they have a nice burping match afterwards. Ahem.   
  
~*~(Back to the lobby.)  
  
"Cpl."Laguna and "Pvt."Squall (although Squall's actually "Cmdr.", but Laguna's weird like that) have almost made it to the lift, when Cadets and SeeDs alike move into the lobby and the crossfire becomes intense. "Cpl."Laguna drags "Pvt."Squall into a nook in the wall conveniently right next to the lift.  
  
"AAH! THE NAZIS HAVE CALLED IN FOR BACKUP! OUR BACKUP DOESN'T STAND A SNOWBALL'S CHANCE IN HELL OF GETTING UP HERE ON TIME, SO WE'LL HAVE TO FIGHT OUT THIS BEACH BY OURSELVES!" Laguna peeks around the corner to the second floor, gripping his machine gun, then turns back to Squall. "WE'RE UP AGAINST TWO MG-42s..." Laguna points to Zell and Raijin bruising students by pegging raw carrots at them. "PLUS ENFILADE FROM..." he points to a random classroom. "THAT BUNKER! WE GOTTA FIND A WAY UP THE BLUFF! WE GOTTA GO UP THERE" he points to the lift, which now has a sign saying "Out of Order" on it. "AND TAKE OUT THAT ARTILLERY!" he points to Seifer and Fuujin beating the shit out of students for "fighting". "COVERING FIRE!" Laguna swiftly ducks out from cover, and, with his "Thompson", (basically his normal machine-gun badly painted to look like a Thompson) opens fire on the 2nd floor, breaking all the glass and KILLING heaps of students. Squall, horror-stricken, attempts to scream (but ends up monotone-talking) "...Corporal, we have no time for covering fire, they're going to launch a bombing run on us if we don't take the beach." Laguna, stupid enough to believe Squall, screams "YOU GO FIRST!". Squall, rather smart, junctions Full-Life to Attack and runs out, "shooting" the dead students with Life. Satisfied with his rectification of his father's mistakes, he takes some tomato sauce from his hair and puts a little bit on his jacket where his heart is, and purposely collapses, unenthusiastically saying "...Ow. I'm hit. Corporal, go on without me." and "dying". Laguna runs up to Squall and over-dramatizes Squall's "death" and throws him in the water with a toy boat, then salutes and attempts to cast Firaga on the boat... but he misses and sets Squall on fire instead.  
  
"AARGH! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING YOU CRAZY BASTARD?!"  
  
"AAAH! A GHOST!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111one" And with that, Squall cast Blizzard on himself several times and Laguna ran off.  
  
~*~(Cut to Zer0Kataru's desk)  
  
Zer0Kataru: Why is Laguna acting so strange? Why is Squall still so calm? I know I would have gone spastic if someone threw salad on my fabulous jacket! When will Disney actually begin the attack? Who will win the freestyling competition? All this, give or take some, in the next chapter of Skies of Shinseiki Kidousenshi Gundam SeeD: War for Sol!  
  
REPLIES TO REVIEWS! ^_^  
  
]Bishi[  
  
Aww, shit.  
  
(I thought you CENSORED "bitch". Now you say "shit"?)   
  
You completley RUINED my second favorite video game  
  
(Hmm...It's some kind of Disney-only game, isn't it? Either way, don't tell me what it is. I'm traumatized enough by "Disney Magical Tetris" and "DDR:Disney Rave Mix" to need to know of your trippy disney games)   
  
by writing about its characters. You couldn't just stop at screwing up GW, could you?   
  
(Nope! ^_^)  
  
I'm sure many people on and off-line hate you.   
  
(Damn straight.)  
  
I sure as hell do.  
  
(Good, cuz you liking me would basically mean you want to do me since I'm a guy.)  
  
]Naomi Hunter[  
  
*grins* I dun have to submit, Huzzah!  
  
(Well technically you did, just a long time ago.)  
  
:p  
  
I'm better than you all.  
  
(True, true. Better than me anyway.)  
  
^_^  
  
*dances around to HIGHER*  
  
"Girl give it up and run my way..."  
  
(It's "Girl, give it up, go and run away")  
  
I wanna play DDR now.  
  
(I just did :P)  
  
Arigatou for the Q/T-x-R.  
  
(Nu problem.)  
  
]Senko[  
  
O-kay...that was REALLY stupid...it made NO sense WHATSOEVER(i DON'T care if  
  
that's not one word-SO LEAVE ME ALONE PEOPLES)...me thinks I'll just go sit in a  
  
corner and think of how STUPID people(YOU) can be...  
  
(Sankyuu very much! ^_^ I live for reviews calling me stupid because my fics are MEANT to be stupid and make no sense! ^_^)  
  
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To Be Continued...  
  
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